Archive | Mind

Happiness or Joy?

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I recently attended an evening meeting with women from my area where the topic of happiness and joy were discussed. It was then that I really started to think about the two, the differences and what I do daily that contributes to one of the other. There is a difference between the two that I never thought about.

Happiness

Happiness is that feeling that comes over you when you know life is good and you can’t help but smile. It is a sense of well-being, joy or contentment.

Some things that make me happy are: playing volleyball, working out, alone time, vacation with the family, the cabin, when I’ve had a successful day of eating healthy, chocolate, shopping, girls nights, date nights, bedtime for the kids, music, a walk outside in the sunshine.

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Joy is the emotion evoked by the prospect of possessing what one desires: delight; the exhibition of such emotion. Bliss. Intense and especially ecstatic or exultant happiness.  The definition of the word “rejoice” from which our word “joy” comes, is to “feel great delight, to welcome or be glad.”

Some things that bring me JOY are: making a family member or friend feel loved or happy, vacation with my husband, seeing my children excel in a sport or activity, connecting with God, hearing my child say a sincere prayer, the beach, the mountains, girls getaway, helping others accomplish their goals, serving others, when a friend or family member feels joy.

Self Reflection

As I looked over my list I realized that most of what brings me joy and FILLS MY SOUL comes from connections with nature, God, my family or serving others. My happy times come mostly from superficial and temporary things.  Experiencing true joy leads to happiness and seems to overflow into many aspects of my life.

How do I accomplish this?  How do you accomplish this?

Focus on others, enjoy the simple things in life, find gratitude in life’s blessings, be the best version of me, seek for light and peace on a daily and sometimes hourly basis and “dance in the downpour”.

This self-discussion and reflection reminded me of what is truly important in my life and that if I desire joy, I need to “throw away the mirrors and look out the window”. (Talk given by Cheryl Esplin which you can find here .)

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What is it that makes you happy and what truly fills your soul?

 

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The Roller Coasters in Life

Life is amazing. And then it's awful. And then it's amazing again. And in between the amazing and the awful its ordinary and mundane and routine. Breathe in the amazing, hold on through the awful, and relax and exhale during the ordinary. That's just living heartbreaking, soul-healing, amazing, awful, ordinary, life. And it's breathtakingly beautiful.

You’ve finally got it figured out.  You feel good, you look good, things are going well.  You’ve read books on self-improvement, health, happiness and can check those off.  You are becoming who you want and life is wonderful, beautiful and amazing.  Then an emotional event or something occurs that throws you off and out of routine.  Pretty soon you are two steps back, the guilt seeps in, frustration takes over and you’re flooded with feelings of failure because you have done this over and over.  You are back on the roller coaster that seems to be a regular ride.

Why does this happen like a rollercoaster in life?  Up, down, all around.  Emotions, thoughts and feelings all over the place.  I know it’s not just me, although I often feel that way.  I’ve met with many woman who go through the same eating roller coaster.  On the up we are doing well and feeling great; in control and making healthy choices and feel peaceful.  On the down, there’s more sugar, more portions, less control = more guilt, frustration and less patience.

I’ve been on this roller coaster for most of my life but recently I thought I had it figured out.  I’ve transformed in many aspects and KNOW HOW and WHAT to do.  I have tools, not just mental and spiritual tools but tools to provide success with my eating- which I use regularly.  For some reason I jumped back on the ride and the roller coaster continues.  You know what I’m talking about right?  When you worry a lot about what you can and can’t eat, how it will or won’t affect your body and that seems to consume your thoughts?  Yeah, that’s where I’ve been AGAIN and I really don’t like it.  Do you enjoy the ride?  I can’t say that I do so here are a few things that I do to get me on solid ground again.

Call it what it is.

I know what is happening, it’s what has happened all along but unlit the past two months I didn’t recognize what it REALLY is.  It’s the cunning devil.  Seriously.  Who else know knows how to make me frustrated, upset, insecure, think unkind things about myself and to think that food will make me happy.  He does and he loves it because it takes away focus from happiness and good.  If he can get me to ride the coaster and feel down about myself, stumble and fall then he is successful- misery loves company.  So I call him out and change my focus.

Choose your ride.

To become grounded again these are a few tips that may help:

*Enjoy the moment.  What is going on RIGHT NOW that I am loving and excited about?  It may be that I got a killer work out in, maybe I had a great hair day or HOORAY I get to watch my kids in their athletics today and see how they have improved.  Maybe it is the WHOLE bag of Cadbury Eggs that I somehow just ate…enjoy it and move on.  Whatever it is, enjoy what is going on at that moment and be grateful.

*Recognize what is happening.  I notice that I am thinking about myself, my body, food, how my clothes fit way too much and not in a positive way.  I feel more emotional, stressed and frustrated.  Is this me?  Do I enjoy this?  Is this happiness and what I want?

*Share your fall or frustrations with others. You’ll be amazed at the support you will get and the support you are to others.

*Relax and focus your attention on others.    At this frustrating moment I realize that I am too focused on me.  Once I begin serving others, focus on my kids, family, neighbors and less on my frustrations, I begin to forget myself and my problems.  The coaster is coming to a stop for me to get off.

As a woman who craves balance, peace, “perfection”- the ups and downs drive me crazy so I seek solid ground as soon as I can.  Life is a journey and I am working on enjoying it with more rides I choose and will enjoy.

What are some things you do when you find yourself out of balance?

 

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Battles We Fight That Change Us Forever.

My Story

Everybody has a story, a battle to fight that changes us forever, inspires others and transforms who we are.  I love hearing them. There is so much to learn from someone who has had a trial and becomes stronger; it explains who they really are and why they believe the way they do. I love connecting with people who will open their heart to me, share their story so I can become a better person. Through these stories we can find hope, peace, knowledge and the fight we didn’t know we had to get through our own trials. I want to share my story so I can be reminded of my fight but more importantly I want to help someone else who needs strength to get through their battle.

Let me give you a little background: I have played sports my entire life. I thrive on working out and working hard. I am competitive. I am fit but I have always struggled with what I wanted my weight to be and my body to look like which has caused some self perception distortions as well as an emotional relationship with food.
I played college volleyball then got my BA in Physical Education and Health, taught high school and coached for years in Utah. I got married and had 3 kids during the span of 8 years then in August of 2008 we moved to WI from Utah and this is where I will begin…

Although I don’t remember when “it” started I do remember approximately one year after living in WI, I noticed a dramatic drop in energy. I remember laying on my living room floor feeling so exhausted I wanted to do nothing; no ambition, no motivation and no energy which was very unusual for me. I would lay there and think, “What is wrong with me? This is not normal. I don’t like this; I’ve got to get up and get going!” so I did. Every day I would go to the gym even if I was tired because I thought if I didn’t work out I would gain weight. If I gained weight I would get fat and I dreaded the thought of that and what came with getting fat.

I had three kids and knew that being a mother was tiring but this exhaustion seemed different yet I didn’t have any reason to think that anything was really wrong. The bouts would come every month for 5-6 days then I would go back to normal for 3 weeks. Life continued, I got pregnant with my 4th child and I continued being very active, working out daily and going 24-7 despite my lack of energy or my bummed left knee that would always hurt. I wasn’t going to let the exhaustion or my knee hold me back from who I wanted to be.

Changes Ahead

When my baby was 18 months old we moved to a new house and new neighborhood and I found myself on the floor more often, more random aches and I noticed that my period was different- which was very unusual.  I was working out and eating healthy but  could not get rid of 5-7 lbs that I typically could release when I focused on my eating and working out a little more. I brought it up to my OB during a visit but he didn’t seem to think it was anything to be concerned about. Once again I brushed it off but deep down I knew something was wrong. Around this time (October) I was introduced by a friend and neighbor to Nutritional Cleansing. I noticed she lost her baby weight and some, looked healthy and energetic and I wanted to know what she was doing. Isagenix and Nutritional Cleansing was something I hadn’t heard before and although I was very curious and I trusted her I was VERY skeptical so I began to ask a lot of questions and do a lot of research on my own. I was desperately looking for answers: more energy, better control with my eating, weight loss, SOMETHING…but not just anything. This was my answer.

After 2 months of research I was ready. I ordered my first cleanse and did the 11 days over Christmas break, talk about discipline! On my first cleanse day I actually threw up and didn’t have a lot of energy so when I called my friend to ask if this was normal she was a bit surprised and told me throwing up wasn’t. I chalked it up to catching a bug from the kids and continued to push through my cleanse. I actually loved it. I loved the discipline although it was challenging. I loved how lean I felt and even more I loved what I was learning about toxicity in our food, air, environment and how it is affecting our body. I loved the ingredients in the products and was BLOWN AWAY when I listened to a Product Analysis Podcast by Peter Greenlaw. He discussed key ingredients in the products, why they are in there, what they do for the body and why our body needs it. After my 11 days I lost 8 lbs and 13″ and I knew this was an answer to my prayers for NUMEROUS reasons; it was more than weight loss

I continued cleansing regularly, taking a shake every day and telling everyone I could about Nutritional Cleansing because it was making such a big difference in my life. I felt fulfillment educating myself and others about what I was learning everyday as I studied nutrition, toxicity, Isagenix and our bodies. I was able to help people reach their health goals and be more confident with themselves. I was happy but I still couldn’t figure out why I continued to have my week of exhaustion every month. I soon realized it occurred when my hormones were at their highest every month. Little did I know that Nutritional Cleansing was going to be more of a blessing than I realized.

A Turn For the Worst

Close to 1 year after I started Isagenix, in September of 2012 things took a turn for the worst. My exhaustion turned to CHRONIC FATIGUE, migraines and pain (which I had never had before) from my shoulders through my neck to the top of my head. I couldn’t sleep because my neck was so sensitive that it kept me awake, tossing and turning. My back and hip began to hurt, I was extremely nauseous and had GI issues and even more frustrating my vision was getting blurry and I kept forgetting things which wasn’t like me at all. I was internally torn knowing that I should be feeling so good because I was taking such good care of my body, making huge changes to my diet as well as my family’s yet I was worse than I had ever felt in my life. Frustrated, being challenged mentally, physically and emotionally I didn’t know what was going on but I knew I had to figure it out, this was NOT okay!

I started with my OBGYN since I knew symptoms were related to my hormones. I got blood work, ultrasounds, more blood work and all of them came back perfect. My OB sent me to a Family Dr and I knew the moment he sat down and started talking that he wasn’t going to help me. He looked at my chart, asked me a few questions and told me he thought it would be a good idea to get on depression medication. He even told me a story about a woman who thought she didn’t need them and ended up back in his office a few months later, tried them and felt so much better. I told him, “I have worked hard to balance my pH, cleanse my body and this is not what I am going to do when you don’t even know what is wrong with me. Thank you.” I left and called my OB for another suggestion. Over the course of 3 months I went to my OB 3 times for more tests all which came back normal; his last suggestion before I gave up on him was that maybe I had Seasonal Depression Disorder…I am not going to lie, I may have, WI has LONG, dreary winters and I love and need the sun but nice try Dr. that wasn’t it and I knew it. It was at that moment that I felt he along with the other doctors I had seen didn’t believe me. He sent me to another family physician who I actually liked and she took the time to listen to me, do more blood work on different panels and realized that my ANA panel was positive. That means that my autoimmune disease test was positive. She called me and told me not to freak out but look up Lupus because that is what I may have according to my symptoms and I need to make an appointment with a Rheumatologist. I was a little freaked out but at least had some relief that we knew what it was so we could work on fixing it. I called the Rheumatologist… and the chase continued. I sat on the table, he looked at my joints, my neck, my head and checked my chart over and over. It was very obvious by his body language and observing him that he was puzzled and didn’t know what was wrong with me. He finally told me that I don’t have Lupus nor MS nor Rheumatoid Arthritis so he didn’t know what was wrong but that he felt I should get a cat scan and go see a GI Dr. I refused the scan and made an appointment with the GI Dr. for the following week.

By this time I was so frustrated, tired, mad and starting to feel a little depression from the lack of help I had received. NOBODY understood what I was going through: I felt like a 90 year old woman on her death bed and I didn’t know how long I wanted to hang on. I don’t remember ever feeling that way before in my life and I didn’t like it. I had no control and couldn’t do anything about it. I was sick and nobody believed me. I wondered if my husband, my friends, my family believed me because the doctors weren’t and they couldn’t find anything wrong. I would get up and try to go to the gym to get myself going but it only made it worse. It took everything I had to get up, take care of the kids and try to live a “normal” life. I put on my happy face because I didn’t want people to know how bad I was suffering on the inside because on the outside I looked fine. On my couch, on my floor, on my bed I would cry and pray that someone/something would help me.

Answers

My prayers unknown to me were being answered. I had a friend suggest that I see her natural path Sue as I was going through this but I pushed it aside, continued seeing doctors who I thought were going to do a test, find out what was wrong and get me on my healthy way. I was skeptical of Sue and her ability to help me, it sounded a little hocus pocus when my friend would say, “she works on you through energy, she can read your energy and tell you everything that is going on inside of your body!” Really? Well after 3 months of getting nowhere with doctors, feeling alone and that nobody believed the pain I was going through and that I REALLY WAS sick I decided to make an appointment with Sue. I had nothing to lose. In the meantime I did make an appointment with a GI Dr which was just as pointless as the rest. The only “good” thing that came of that is a couple days after my appt. with him I had blood in my stool so he got me in for a colonoscopy…awesome. I had had one before when I was first married for some bad stomach issues but the results were fine, so I knew what I was in for. Let me just say that NO a colonoscopy prep and Nutritional Cleansing have NOTHING in common. The Dr. did find a pre-cancerous polyp which he removed and advised I get a colonoscopy every 3 years. Ugh.

The November day arrived for me to meet with Sue and I was nervous but more sick than anything. I needed help and I didn’t know that I was going to get it immediately from her. I found a babysitter for my little girls and was with Sue for 4.5 hours!! Her Quantum biofeedback was the COOLEST thing I have EVER done. Our bodies are made of energy and this machine reads that energy and can look through every panel of your body and tell you what is going on. She told me things about my body (like I am lactose intolerant) that I didn’t tell her. She is not an MD and does not diagnose but she did tell me that it was showing I had Lyme bacteria all over my body and as we went through the panels it was the cause for all of my issues. Late stage Lyme and I was affected neurologically. My body was a mess but at the same time she said my environmental toxin levels were lower than she had ever seen and she could tell that I was giving my body good nutrition…THANK YOU ISAGENIX! I knew it was awesome but what I didn’t know was how I got Lyme? I never saw a tick, nor a bulls eye rash.

Long story short, my vagus nerve was severely damaged by the Lyme which was causing my neck and head to hurt and since it is the source of all automatic responses it is also the source of my blurry vision, plugged ears, memory loss and digestive issues. Before I even left her office I felt better and I knew this was the answer to my MANY prayers. My next concern was how I was going to pay for all the treatments since insurance didn’t.

My symptoms returned a week later and I went back to see Sue. My husband wasn’t sold on the idea of me having to pay so much for an undetermined amount of time and questioned if I was sure this was the right thing to do. I knew people thought I was crazy and they were concerned for my health and wellness but what they didn’t know is what I was feeling inside and how I KNEW without a doubt that is what I needed to do. Once again Sue helped me feel better, educated me, gave me some supplements and we discussed a plan… antibiotics came up. I was hesitant to take antibiotics and Sue wasn’t sold either, but I knew I wanted to do everything I could to get rid of this hell inside me.

I began researching Lyme Disease, hours on end. I wanted to know everything about it, how to treat it, what it does and I wanted to talk to others who have gone through it so I could be prepared to fight this. I was able to get in contact with numerous people all over the US who have Late Stage Lyme and the symptoms and experiences with doctors all seemed the same. I learned that the natural healing route was the most successful; nutrition, rest and cleansing were a must. I had a new appreciation for Isagenix and knew it has been placed in my life for a reason. Every doctor, nurse, person who had experience with illness and natural healing all focused on cleansing. I would continue cleansing but I needed antibiotics.

Sue wasn’t able to give me a prescription for antibiotics because she was not an MD so I had to find someone who could. I went back to my GI Dr and without telling him I knew I had Lyme I asked him to test for it. He reluctantly agreed to test for that as well as Celiac Disease but was certain the Lyme could not be the cause of my problems. My test showed up negative (which 50% of tests do- they are considered “false negative”); the Dr. would not write me an Rx for antibiotics so I went to my next option. I was referred to Dr. Whitcomb in Brookfield who was a practicing physician turned homeopath who specializes in Lyme Disease from a woman whose son had Lyme. It made me sick to think of spending $300 for 1 hour with him but I knew it had to be done. I was able to be diagnosed by him from my symptoms and was told to go gluten, dairy and sugar free. He gave me a plan, talked about the need to cleanse (I had taken in all my Isagenix products to show him and he was very impressed and told me to keep doing it) and said he wanted to see me in 1 month.

I felt a flood of emotions regularly: frustration that this disease is so controversial yet so detrimental to the body. MAD that insurance won’t pay for natural medicine when that’s what works best for some (most) people. Guilty for spending so much money on me. Sad for the people who had been suffering for years with no relief. Worry that I would have to deal with this for the rest of my life but happy I found what was wrong so I could work on getting better.

Healing

For the next year I would have good days and bad days but I learned many life lessons along the way. I took a month off the gym and rested my body, eventually I was able to get back 1-3 times a week. It was during this time that my obsession of the gym was thrown out the window. I realized I would be okay if I didn’t make it daily. I couldn’t go daily, and I knew it wasn’t because I was lazy but because my body was telling me it needed rest, from working hard to fight. My feeling toward my body changed, I was more appreciative and felt blessed for the good days I had and took advantage of those days. I had my bad days, bad weeks and I would struggle to find peace that I was ever going to get over this. Would I ever be able to work out as intense as I’d like again? Would I have energy to play with my kids, go hiking, biking, play volleyball, work in the yard even half of what I did before? I felt a lot of discouragement at times but I knew with the support of my family (thank goodness they believed me and did everything they could to help) and my knowledge that my God would help me, I could get through this.

In May 1, 2014 which is 1.5 years after I found out I had Lyme and I was doing well…not 100%, I still have my days of fatigue but instead of 5-6 days a month it is down to 3-4. Well enough that I wake up in the morning ready to go to the gym instead of dreading to get up just wanting to sleep longer. I am able to go to the gym or exercise 5 days a week, play volleyball, play with kids, coach volleyball, and be a wife and mom without feeling like I need to go to bed by 7 pm. I have energy, I have motivation and ambition, I feel like there is hope and that I can overcome this battle as I continue to eat clean, cleanse, exercise but rest when I need to.
I have the energy, motivation and passion to help others achieve their health goals and I feel extremely blessed to have the knowledge, experience and tools to do so. Life is good. Life is hard and challenging but my challenge has made me a better person. I am strong. I am a fighter. I am blessed tremendously to have Isagenix and my natural path as tools to help my body and mind heal. Health is a battle worth fighting for and I am winning the fight.

 

What is YOUR story that has changed your life?

 

Here is more of My Story and journey.

 

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The Truth the Media Doesn’t Want you to Know

Her Value is More Precious than Rubies

The other day I walked past the floor-length bathroom mirror and caught a glimpse of myself out of the corner of my eye. I felt truly beautiful and valuable, kind of out of nowhere. It really surprised me! I haven’t forgotten the feeling and want to share because it has calmed all the negative voices once and for all and I am truly happy and working patiently where I’m at. But it wasn’t always that way.

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The struggle is REAL!

Seriously! Can any of you relate? I’ve struggled with self-worth since I was a teenager. I became more aware of my looks and body shape, I started to compare myself with others, criticize my flaws, and cared way too much about what others thought. These feelings of not being enough stuck as I moved through college and marriage.

At the height of some of my most difficult Mom years, I had 5 kids under the age of 7–all BOYS! My husband was in residency and I mothered full time at home with my beautiful babies.  We had a LOT of fun and I worked my butt off, but I was also overwhelmed and stressed out, not to mention sleep deprived trying my best to be a great Mom! It didn’t help that everywhere I went, people bombarded me with rude comments and intrusive questions about my age and the number of kids we have etc. At the time I didn’t know how to handle the emotional attacks other than to feel shocked for the harsh judgments being thrown at me. This happened so regularly that over time, I came to feel so undervalued.

3 Books that Shift Negativity

I needed support and I needed the best kind. I turned to Gordon B. Hinkley’s book Standing For Something. AH-Maaa-zing! He prompts, “The home produces the nursery stock of new generations and parents are the gardeners. In that light, I must emphasize the importance, the value, the singular impact that women have within the fabric of our society and in the makeup of our homes.” I had to let that sink in. Internalizing this idea has been a turning point for me. My role as a mom to a handful of kids wasn’t just valuable, it had the power to influence generations. Wow! This woke me up. I started to see I truly had the power to change how I felt about myself and my role as a mother.

When negativity came my way, I followed another trick from Gordon—as much as I could, I made it an opportunity to respond with humor and love. A couple of my favorites:

1) In the checkout at the grocery store I could count on the clerk to ask with wide eyes and a sagging jaw (in reference to the kids in and on the cart), “Are they all yours???” I’d smile and reply back, “Aren’t they adorable? There’s a buy one get one free sale and there were only 5 left. You owe me a kid!” 😉

2) Going place to place like a Mama with her ducklings all in a line, others would see me and ask, “Are you the Nanny?” (HA!) I’d smile and say, “No, they’re mine.” That was followed by disbelief and the remark “You look so young!” and then (of course) the demand to know, “How old are you?” I decided because this is one of the top questions I get, for my own sanity I’d not just change the subject or ignore it, but answer with, “Isn’t it great? When I’m 50 I’ll be looking fabulous!”

This kind of response either made people laugh, changed their attitude, or shut them up. It’s funny to watch—try it! This positive spin is so helpful in keeping a better perspective for myself and it shows a good example to our kids.

Another book that really helped is I am a Mother, by Jayne Clayson Johnson. She shares, “[M]otherhood involves some sacrifices…You will certainly lose some sleep over the years, and, every now and then, you might temporarily lose your sanity. But you will also learn about yourself…the world…the Spirit…As you learn these things…you do not lose your identity, [but you more] closely identify with God.” Isn’t that amazing? It reminded me of Lucia in Max Lucado’s book, You are Special. She didn’t let the dots or stars others tried to put on her stick to her. I decided, I wasn’t going to either. It’s such a gift that we can become free and unspotted from the judgements others throw our way and identify ourselves as His greatest creations.

Jeffrey R. Holland teaches, God “knows your name and knows your circumstance. He hears your prayers. He knows your hopes and dreams, including your fears and frustrations…and He knows what you can become through faith in Him.” When we truly understand His love for us, the confusion clears and our priorities align. Our walk as disciples of Christ becomes more joyful and our lives take on new meaning. It’s so refreshing to look in the mirror and not focus on the imperfections, but to see myself as a beautiful daughter of God, precious and happy. I’m excited I am finally here!

What are your favorite ways to combat negativity? Do you also have some favorite positive responses? I’d love to hear them!

 

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This 1 thing will change your life: Hour of Power

Have you been feeling like something in life is missing and you just aren’t sure what? I know I have! Last year for my New Years’ resolution—and for the first time in my life—I only had 1 thing on my list—to have a real relationship with God! No more unrealistic expectations and no more guilt or shame for not having reached those goals!

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Let Spiritual Struggles Bring You Closer to God

But let’s back up a little…you might be wondering why it was so important to me to just do one simple resolution…and why I chose what I chose. Let’s just say, 2013 and 2014 were the most spiritually challenging years of my life! Mostly because of stupid choices I made, but also because I was feeling lost in my heart and even though I went through the motions of praying, reading the Word, and going to church—I was mostly checking the boxes and not truly soaking in the love and life that He offers. I was physically spent trying to be there for our then 6 kids, emotionally exhausted supporting my stressed out husband, and honestly—I was just plain unhappy with life. I went to a lot of counselling—I even dragged my hubby along! HA! I read lots of books! I learned some helpful things during that time, but after pondering, doing some real praying, and knowing everything I’d already tried still left me wanting, I realized there had been times when I felt so complete and satisfied with my life. During those times, I was leaning upon the Lord for everything. I had been consistently close to God in the past and knew getting back there would do the trick.

 3 simple ways to Draw Nearer unto God; Hour of Power

Fast Forward to 2015: Once I was super clear on what I wanted, it all came together beautifully! I got up early at the same time every day (that I got up—which was fairly consistent) and I practiced doing the same 3 things:

  1. Sincerely Pray
  2. Read Scriptures with purpose
  3. Journal about It

The Most Important Hour of Your Day

I call it my hour of power! I have to admit, for the first few months I struggled! I would fall asleep while praying, get distracted, have to refocus my thoughts, reread passages, and I felt like it wasn’t working. I really, really wanted to do this though and I stuck with it. I began to see that when I took the time to spiritually create my day, I could handle the physical part of it so much easier. My heart began to heal and I began to start my mornings with a feeling of peaceful ambition. On the days I slept in, I missed having that great start and the lack of sticking to my goal showed in the quality of my day. It was good motivation for me to get back to it. After about 4 months of doing this, something finally clicked! I began to feel a deep connection with God. I had a greater desire to feel His love every day. I started to see my life as one that needed to become spiritually self-reliant by becoming completely reliant upon God. David O. McKay once said, “Spirituality is the highest acquisition of the soul, the divine in man; the supreme, crowning gift that makes him King of all created things. It is the consciousness of victory over self and of communion with the infinite. It is spirituality alone which gives one the best in life.” Doesn’t he just put it so well? I truly feel this way! My life is exponentially better since starting my mornings with God and they just keep getting better!

Bring more power to your day by taking the 30 Day Challenge!
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7 principles that can restore your marriage

20My husband and I recently went through a trying season in our marriage. I’m willingly transparent and open about this for one reason… if sharing these thoughts will encourage even ONE person to keep on fighting for their marriage, then it would have served it’s purpose. I’m so glad we didn’t give up on each other, because we have emerged stronger and our marriage is happier now than ever.

7 principles that can restore your marriage

  1. Here’s an interesting fact I learned in a family studies class in college.  They surveyed couples that rated their marriage as unhappy and followed up with these couples after 5 years.  Turns out 85% of unhappy couples bounced back!  After the 5 year period, they rated their marriage as happy or very happy.  Not all marriages work out of course, but when things get rocky, it’s good to remember the odds and keep the hope alive.
  2. I’ve learned to shift my perspective and see relationships as a “total package” deal.  The weakness of your partner is the price you pay for all their strengths. When you marry them, you marry ALL of them… the good and the bad. The known and the unknown. The past, the present AND the future. Here’s what I realized… dealing with my husband’s weaknesses is simply the cost to have such an overall ROCKIN man. Besides… he puts up with all my nonsense too!
  3. There is a force of darkness hell bent on destroying marriages because the deepest source of joy in this life comes from these precious family relationships. One day we realized we had to stop fighting each other and instead fight against the real enemy. Because the truth is, when your partner loses, you lose too. Placing blame in marriage is like saying, “your side of the boat is sinking.”
  4. What you focus on expands!!  I was teaching kids at church about gratitude once, so I asked them to look around the room for 1 minute and try to find as many yellow things as they could.  Then I told them to close their eyes and asked them to repeat to me everything in the room that was purple.  They couldn’t do it.  Not one single thing.  When we become so focused on one bad habit or weakness, we miss out on all the beauty there in plain sight. So when we choose to magnify the good, that’s what we’ll see!
  5. We can’t change or control anyone. Only God has that power.  All we can do is to be an example and be their best friend.  That will do more to help people improve than anything else we could say or do.
  6. Love is simply a choice. Stephen R. Covey once said, “Love is a verb. Love the feeling is a fruit of love the verb.” If you feel you’re falling “out of love” that just means you need to serve each other, sacrifice for each other, listen to each other- really listen. If we both wake up every day and ask ourselves, “What can I do today to make life easier for my best friend” we simply can’t fail.
  7. Most of all, I’ve learned to rely on the Lord and trust Him. Many counselors have noted that they’ve never seen a couple in serious marital trouble who were still praying together daily. There is true power in seeking Lord’s help to restore the love and light in our marriages. Jesus Christ is the ultimate healer. He not only heals our bodies but our relationships too. He can and He WILL breathe life into our marriages if we ask Him in faith.

These are 7 principles that healed and restored our marriage.Happy and free woman facing the sun.

What principles have you lived by to help heal your marriage?

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The first and greatest commandment

“Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and greatest commandment.” (Matthew 22:38-39)

Blessings of Keeping a Journal

Today I read through a journal I’ve kept over the last few years and noticed something that really made an impact on me. I marked each day I had prayed and studied the scriptures and noticed the periods in my life that I had done these things consistently were the times I wrote about deep contentment and serenity.  My marriage was rock solid, and I seemed to have more patience with the kids.  It’s not that my life was free of trials during these times, but I seemed to have a greater resolve and strength to get through those trials – a strength beyond my own.

Make time for the Lord

Prayer and scripture study are gospel basics that I KNOW I need to do. But the challenge is in the DOING and doing it consistently and doing it right. Admittedly, I’ve done it all wrong too often. There are days when I’m completely sleep deprived. I’ve been up with an infant or a sick child, so I wake up with just enough time to scramble to get myself and everyone else ready. So in other words, I make time for everyone… except the Lord.  The rush of the day begins, and I have every intention of praying and reading scriptures during the day, but sometimes, somehow I get distracted or pulled in so many directions that it just doesn’t happen.  “The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.” (Matthew 26:4) My intentions are good but I just don’t always have the discipline to follow through.  But the truth is…  “If you can’t find time to pray or read scriptures, you’re busier than God ever intended you to be.” -Dieter F. Uchtdorf.

Communicate with Him more sincerely

Another mistake I’ve made is to be too casual with prayer and use “vain repetitions”. Or I’ll start a prayer, and allow my mind to wander off onto something else, or on occasion, if it’s a bedtime prayer, I’ve even fallen asleep in the middle of it. Although I believe the Lord is pleased with any sincere effort we make to communicate with Him, I think He expects more from us. He asks us to be sincere and penitent. Thankfully, He is eternally patient and kind with me and with all of His children. He wants to bless us! And He already knows what we need but we must ask Him in prayer. I love this quote from the Bible dictionary, “The object of prayer is not to change the will of God, but to secure for ourselves and for others blessings that God is already willing to grant, but that are made conditional on our asking for them.” and ” … your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him.” (Matthew 6:8).

I think as mothers in particular, we have a great need to renew ourselves spiritually each day. As much as I adore my children and LOVE what I do, motherhood and homemaking can be exhausting. So we especially need to draw upon the power of God so we can best serve our families. To let Him pour his love into us, so we can pour it into our loved ones.  They deserve nothing less than a balanced wife and mother who has made time to commune with the Lord.

Make God your priority

So I made a decision to be more consistent in prayer and it has been a great blessing in my life. Sometimes all it takes is ONE small choice, we just have to make up our minds, and choose to put Him first. The change came about as I asked myself, what is the single MOST important thing in my life? And the answer came, it is truly my relationship with God and my love for Him. So who then should get first priority in my life? Not my husband, not my kids, not even myself… God should! So I decided the very first thing in the morning– every morning– my knees will hit the floor, to show my love and devotion to Him each day. It’s a simple ritual, but it makes a tremendous difference in my life.

I know there is power in prayer. When I sincerely pour out my heart to Him… I literally feel the burdens lift. Sometimes the problems remain, but I can let go of the negative and worrisome thoughts, and choose to be happy and trust in the Lord.

I even put a pillow down beside my bed, as a symbol and a reminder of my desire to keep the first and great commandment.  It is now a permanent fixture beside our bed.

“Men and women who turn their lives over to God will discover that He can make a lot more out of their lives than they can” Pres. Benson declared. “He willJesus Christ Knocking deepen their joys, expand their vision, quicken their minds, strengthen their muscles, lift their spirits, multiply their blessings, increase their opportunities, comfort their souls, raise up friends, and pour out peace. Whoever will lose his life in the service of God will find eternal life” (Teachings, p. 361).

He truly does make more out of us than we could ever make of ourselves. And that is what I noticed in my journal I discovered me without Him… and me with Him. And I definitely prefer the latter! And I think my family does too. 🙂

So we have a choice. We can choose to go it alone in life, relying on our own strength, our own intellect, and our own abilities, or we can trust in Him to walk us through this life and compensate for what we lack. He wants to bless us and fulfill the petitions of our hearts but we must take the initiative and let him in.

What do you do to make God a priority and improve your communication with him?

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15 powerful books that will change your life forever

15 POWERFUL BOOKS THAT WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE FOREVER

  1. The Secret by Rhonda Byrne
  2. The Emotion Code by Bradley Nelson
  3. Remembering Wholeness by Carol Tuttle
  4. Man’s Search for Happiness by Elbert Hubbard
  5. The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch
  6. Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom by Don Miguel Ruiz & Janet Mills
  7. The Mastery of Love by Don Miguel Ruiz & Janet Mills
  8. Happiness Advantage: The Seven Principles of Positive Psychology  That Fuel Success and Performance at Work by Shawn Achor
  9. Think & Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill
  10. Spiritual Roots of Human Relations by Stephen R. Covey
  11. The Traveler’s Gift: Seven Decisions that Determine Personal Success by Andy Andrews
  12. The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown
  13. The Power of Vulnerability by Brene Brown
  14. How Will You Measure Your Life? by Clayton M. Christensen
  15. The Presence Process: A Healing Journal Into Present Moment Awareness by Michael Brown

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Transform Your Body Happy Mom

 

 

 

 

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